Pearl Miller, 1920-2007
We buried my grandma today.
I got the call from my mom on Thursday evening that my grandma, who’d had Alzheimer’s for over 15 years, and who’d been in a full-care home for the last decade, had stopped swallowing (her body had forgotten how) and hadn’t had any fluids in about 48 hours. The end, according to the care workers with whom my mom had spoken, could come in a few days or in a few weeks.
That end came less than 12 hours later.
Trudged through my work day on Friday — everyone at the office was super-supportive[1] — and made arrangements to fly out here to Clovis for the funeral.[2]
Now, this was the third of my grandparents to pass away, but I’d been unable to make it out for the first two — I was stuck out in Ohio when the first died, and wasn’t in a position to fly out here when the second died.
This was, in fact, my first funeral. The closest I’d come before today was a ceremony of remembrance for Scott’s mom.
(Rather par for the course for me, though: The first wedding I went to was my own, in Vegas, twelve years ago tomorrow.)
So, that said, I don’t really have a frame of reference for how these things go. It was an emotional day (obviously) for all of us, but was filled with good memories and stories, and brought together some members of the extended family who haven’t been seen or heard from in nigh on a decade.
I don’t know that I have a whole lot more to say right now.
1. They even sent flowers. Cool.
2. The plan was to fly America West America’s Worst US Airways out from Oakland to Albuquerque, and then to continue straight on to Clovis on some small regional airline. Well, the flight out of Oakland was delayed (for no good reason), and then the layover in Phoenix was also delayed (because they couldn’t get the weather computer to boot and had to call out their I.T. guys). I ended up touching down in ABQ 10 minutes before my flight to CVN was due to depart. After waiting for everybody in the plane to disembark, my frenzied, spastic, wheezing dash through the airport was to no avail: I got to the new airline’s desk two minutes after the flight left.
I ended up renting a car and driving from Albuquerque to Clovis.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
So sorry, Kevin — praying for peace on your family.
> Hope that you are ok.
I am so sorry. It is terribly sad when the people we love run out of life before we are ready. Alex and I will pray for you and your family.
Love Sara
Funerals are a curious event. You’re sad for you, because you miss your loved one. But you’re happy for them, because they are in A Better Place [1].
Take care, Kev. Jenn, Kyle, Josh and I are beaming you hugs from Florida.
- Scott
[1] Your mileage may vary, consult your holy scriptures or preferred deity for more details.
So sorry to hear about your grandmother, Kevin. I hope you are coping ok.
I am so sorry for your loss. I found your site because I googled my 4-year-old daughter’s name, which happens to also be Pearl Miller. Your grandmother sounds like she was a lovely lady (with a lovely name to match). My deepest condolences to you and your family.